In Writing, I Found the Purpose in My Pain

by Rebecca Olmstead

I had completed my first mystery novel and done a marathon of three writers’ conferences, my first ever, pitching my baby to less-than-enthusiastic agents and editors.

Still, I loved my book, the first in a planned series. Nothing was going to stand in the way of my dream.

My Book Began as a Blog

Then, that fall, my doctor spoke the words that changed my life, “You have a tumor.”

Loved So Much It Hurts began as a patient blog my husband, Chuck, set up to keep family and friends abreast of my condition and treatment.

The last thing on my mind at that time was writing another book. When I was able, I took over with daily reports. But things soon began to change.

The New Insight I Gained from Blogging About My Cancer Journey

Along with the struggles and humor of everyday life, the pain and fear of waiting for biopsy results, surgeries, recovery, and eventually, nightmarish withdrawals from massive amounts of narcotics made their way onto the pages of my blog.

When they did, words of encouragement and strength would follow, and I would find myself rejoicing in spite of myself.

Then I began receiving comments from people all over the world, thanking me for encouraging and inspiring them to greater faith! I had no doubt that the words I wrote were not my own, but I began to see that this journey was not just about me.

At First, Writing My Ministry Blog was Discouraging

I also realized, much to my surprise, that the way God saw me was vastly different from the way I saw myself. All my life, I had been devalued and told I had no credibility. When I was led to create an online ministry, I began to question my sanity.

As soon as I started work on that ministry blog, WatchGodWork.com, I was hit from every side. Discouragement over my own inabilities, rebellious teens, a hostile ex-husband… I was so tempted to give up and go back to bed with a year’s supply of dark chocolate.

Luckily, I was blessed with a strong will. When the Lord reminded me that my enemy wanted that nothing more, the gloves came off. I was determined to see it through.

One of the conferences I’d attended provided me with a blog designer, and the winnings from a literary contest provided the cash. WatchGodWork.com is now read all over the world. I never saw that coming.

Of course, that was just the beginning.

Writing a Book Was Even Harder than Going Through Cancer

Before I even launched WatchGodWork, I was reminded by a friend that my story wasn’t for my benefit alone. I needed to put it into a book.

Oh, boy.

This was even harder than going through cancer. All of the drugs I had been on at the time of my illness had numbed me, but now I would be forced to face my demons head-on.

This was a long, painful process. I would write down the bones, and my critique group would say, “You’re just telling. Show us. We want to feel what you felt.”

Well, that sounds great, but it meant that I would have to feel what I felt. All the pain. All the fear. All the disappointment, guilt, anger…all of it.

My first book signing.

Writing My Story Allowed My Soul to Heal

Many times, I cried my way through a chapter and would have to stop and recover for a time, talking things out with Chuck, and praying through it. I was recovering physically from my ordeal, but writing Loved So Much It Hurts, a two-year journey, allowed my soul to heal as well. My friend’s words, “People need your story,” kept me going.

Writing this book also gave me the ability to see that I am not the sum of my past experiences. I was created for a purpose and destiny beyond anything I could have imagined. I just needed to forgive and let go of the past and step into my future.

My biggest triumph came in editing the book. When I clearly saw the path this ordeal led me on, from being broken to recognizing the flaws in my self-image, to being set on my true life’s path. That was when I realized the purpose in my pain and truly believed that “all things work together for good to them who love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose.”

Advice for a Young Writer: Never Underestimate Yourself

The most important thing I can share with writers is never underestimate yourself. Don’t waste your time wondering who wants to read what you write. Just write!

Invest in classes and conferences that teach you how to be the best storyteller you can be, and in good editors and software that help you do the same.

My self-doubt cost me precious time, not to mention thousands of dollars on “small” and “hybrid” presses I thought would do all the hard stuff for me. These were expensive lessons that brought discouragement and self-condemnation. But they also brought determination.

There are very successful self-published authors and marketers out there who are more than capable of teaching you all they know through online workshops and webinars. Invest in yourself! Not in organizations that will hold your work hostage and leave you no control.

If I can learn how to format, publish, and market my own books and be successful with Facebook Ads and Amazon promotions, anyone can. I have also been bold in approaching book stores about doing readings and signings.

Learn how to prepare an impressive media kit, rack cards, and business cards and have them with you at all times. You are your own best advertiser. If you don’t believe in your work, no one else will.

So, go for it! And be the best storyteller you can be.

* * *

Founder of Watch God Work Ministries, Rebecca Olmstead is an award-winning author and prophetic intercessor. In her latest book, Loved So Much It Hurts: Purpose in the Pain, Rebecca shares her journey through cancer, her miraculous healing, and the spiritual transformation it brought. She has also released her award-winning story, “The Uninvited Guest: A Short Story,” on Amazon.

Her writing has also appeared in The Upper Room, Focus on the Family’s Clubhouse, Jr., Live, Now What?, Houseboat magazine, on her online ministry, www.watchgodwork.com, and on her author website, www.rebeccaolmstead.com. She is currently working on the second edition of Loved So Much It Hurts, as well as a companion devotional, a mystery series, and a collection of short stories.

Rebecca loves teaching, encouraging, and inspiring others to reach new heights. She lives with her husband and the youngest of their five children in southeastern Washington with their black lab and host of Jersey Wooly and Holland Lop bunnies.

Connect with Rebecca on Twitter, Facebook, Pinterest, and LinkedIn.


Loved So Much It Hurts: Answers to prayer rarely look like we expect.

When Rebecca Olmstead began to ask God for more of Him, the last place she expected to find herself was Seattle Cancer Care Alliance.

Bedridden and helpless, Rebecca had no choice but to give God her undivided attention. Through surgeries, miracles, excruciating pain, and terrifying withdrawals, God began to reveal His sovereignty, grace and love. But He didn’t stop there. He would also show Rebecca that He had a plan for her life far beyond what she ever could have imagined.

If you’ve ever doubted God’s love, or wondered if there could possibly be a reason for your suffering, this book is for you. What He did for Rebecca, He will do for you!

Available at Amazon and Barnes & Noble.